How to Win at Shitty Wizard

by Low Cunning

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Retrovertigo I’m the winner. It’s me Favorite track: Greetings, Gameplayer!.

	/

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$3 USD or more
Cassette + Digital Album
Enjoy your dungeon tip in mellifluous analog warmth with this cassette. Side A contains "Tips, Tricks, and Strategies", vintage hints intoned over rich atmospheric dungeon synth-ish atmospheric tones. Side B is the entirety of "Greetings, Gameplayers!" utilizing cut-up narration samples from classic VHS strategy tapes atop slowly shifting drone.

Pro dubbed and pad printed on tasteful red cassettes with ruby red cases and delicate vellum inserts. Edition of 70, with 50 via Bandcamp and 20 strewn about the universe at my whim.

Limit 2 per order, please. International friends, I'm sorry as usual for shipping - but I've put feelers out for some Euro distro, so hang tight. (Not Euro? Sorry. Put me in contact with your favorite distro.)

Includes unlimited streaming of How to Win at Shitty Wizard via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

ships out within 7 days

edition of 50

$10 USD or more

	1.	Tips, Tricks, and Strategies 22:34
	2.	Greetings, Gameplayer! 23:46
	3.	Tips, Tricks, and Strategies (Instrumental) 22:33
	4.	Greetings, Gameplayer! (Instrumental) 23:46
	5.	Tips, Tricks, and Strategies (Alt Instrumental) 22:30

about

Introducing "dungeon tip" — atmospheric(ish) long-form music overlaid with hints for your favorite NES games. Arguably the least video game but somehow most dungeon synth Low Cunning release, "How to Win at Shitty Wizard" falls outside of the usual narrative cannon and integrates modular and looping elements into the usual over-effected guitar you've come to begrudge. Plus borderline nonsensical video game tips.

If you're not in the mood for out-of-context, baffling, and downright wrong vintage game guidance, each purchase also includes an instrumental version of the two main tracks plus an alternate instrumental edit of "Tips, Tricks, and Strategies."

credits

released July 28, 2023

Music and original narrative interpretation and interpolation performed by Z. Emerson Weston

"Tips..." copy originally published in "Compute!'s Guide to Nintendo Games" by Steve Schwartz
"Greetings..." narration originally performed by Neil Ross on Game Player's Magazine Gametapes

license

about

Low Cunning Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Fake video game music for fake video games with fake synth sounds made by real guitars.

Call the Tipline of the Shitty Wizard: (888) 351-2666. Updated whim-ishly.

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